Ghosts Ain’t Real

DUKE/EMMA/BIFF

Don’t believe what you heard,

‘Cause here is the deal:

There is no need to panic,

‘Cause ghosts ain’t real!

(LAUGHING)

DUKE

I don’t believe in ghosts.

EMMA

They don’t give me a fright.

BIFF

I don’t believe in anything

That bumpity-bumps in the night!

(LAUGHS)

DUKE

If you see things,

that you can’t explain…

EMMA

Best to ignore them.

BIFF

Or go insane.

CEMETERY STONES

Oooo-oooo-oooo-oooo!

MUGMAN

You said they ain’t real,

They seem pretty real!

SPOOKY TREE

Waaaah-aaaaa-aaaaa-aaaaa!

CUPHEAD

Listen Mugman,

We’re caught in a jam.

Pipe down,

‘Cause we gotta scram!

DUKE/EMMA/BIFF

I don’t believe in ghosts,

They don’t give me a fright.

I don’t believe in anything

That bumpity-bumps in the night!

I don’t believe in spooks,

But when I’m all alone,

I have heard mysterious things,

That bang and clang and moan.